Values Exercise
"Values are this really nice useful tool to think about how do you make better decisions to maximize for your own alignment with life." - Ada Chen Rekhi
What It Is
The Values Exercise is a 10-15 minute structured process for identifying what truly matters to you. Unlike trying to generate values from scratch (which is overwhelming), this exercise presents you with a list of potential value words, which you filter down to your core 3-5 values.
The output is an "internal scorecard" of what matters to you in decision-making—as opposed to the external scorecard of status, money, and how others perceive you. This becomes a tool for evaluating whether decisions and situations align with what you actually care about.
Ada Chen Rekhi uses this exercise with everyone she coaches. It helps people recognize when they're optimizing for external validation (the "ego monster") rather than genuine fulfillment.
How It Works
The Process
Review a comprehensive list of value words (autonomy, adventure, creativity, security, family, achievement, etc.)
First pass: Select all that resonate - Don't overthink it, just pick words that feel important to you
Group similar values - Cluster related concepts (e.g., "growth," "learning," "development" might be one theme)
Stack rank your groups - Force yourself to prioritize. What matters most when values conflict?
Write 3-5 value statements - Turn each top value into a sentence that captures what it means to you
- Example: "Choose adventure"
- Example: "Treat others how you want to be treated"
- Example: "Keep getting better"
Using Your Values
Once identified, your values become a decision-making filter:
- Draw a straight line forward - If you continue on your current path, how well does it optimize for your values?
- Apply to specific decisions - When facing a choice, evaluate each option against your values
- Look for missing values - If a decision feels wrong but passes your values test, you may have discovered a new value to add
How to Apply It
- Do the exercise - Set aside 15 minutes. Find a values word list online or create your own
- Apply immediately - Pick a current decision and evaluate it against your values
- Notice gaps - When something feels off but your values say it's fine, investigate why
- Revisit periodically - Values evolve. Update your list as you change
- Use as a check - Before major decisions, explicitly ask: "Does this align with my values?"
Example Application (from the episode)
Lenny identified values including:
- Choose adventure
- Stay optimistic
- Treat others how you want to be treated
- Keep getting better
- Act generously
When evaluating whether to write a book, he realized the beginning is an adventure but the ongoing commitment isn't. This helped explain why the course he taught "didn't bring joy"—it violated his value of adventure.
When to Use It
- Career crossroads - Should I take this job? Start this company? Make this change?
- Feeling stuck - When you can't articulate why you're unhappy
- External pressure - When others' expectations conflict with your instincts
- Life transitions - Major changes often require revisiting what you value
- Coaching context - Ada uses this with every founder she coaches
The Trap to Avoid
Ada describes a "terrible outcome": waking up late in your career feeling trapped because you optimized for external expectations—lifestyle, status, what others think—but you're not happy. The Values Exercise helps you catch this pattern early by making your internal scorecard explicit.
Source
- Guest: Ada Chen Rekhi
- Episode: "Feeling stuck? Here's how to know when it's time to leave your job | Ada Chen Rekhi"
- Key Discussion: (00:16:51) - Introduction to the values exercise and live demonstration with Lenny
- YouTube: Watch on YouTube
Related Frameworks
- Inner vs Outer Scorecard - Warren Buffett's framing that complements this exercise
- Explore and Exploit - Career strategy framework that uses values as a guide